Unrequited Love

Last week there was an *incident*.
I was in my front yard being groomed when a Staffy moseyed on up to me. I was very happy as I love meeting other doggies and we had a nice sniff of each other. Little did I know what effect that friendly first sniff would have on that Staffy.

3:30 p.m. Said Staffy knocked me to the ground and proceeded to violate me mercilessly from head (yes head!) to tail. He was very determined – I could not get up and Mumma could not get him off me!

3:31 My Little Hooman began heroic distraction efforts! He took a treat and with lots of effort (10 minutes of effort!) he finally lured said Staffy away long enough for Mumma to make a break with me for the front door.

3:42 p.m. As I went through the door said Staffy finally caught on to what was happening and ran under my long legs and into the house!

3:42 and a few seconds my other Little Hooman exhibited amazing quick thinking skills by exiting said Staffy out the back door, and into the back yard.

Mumma was very worried that the Staffy had hurt me from knocking me to the ground. So She checked me all over before sneaking out the back to check on the Staffy.

3:51 p.m. Staffy had knocked over the enitre contents of my water trough onto my backyard bed! And was busy ‘expressing himself’ all over the garden! Unfortunately he was not wearing a collar or any identification.
My Little Hooman suggested that we let him out the front to find his way home. So that’s what we did. Although Mumma says in retrospect she should have called the ranger – but didn’t think of it at the time!

But said Staffy did not go home. He stayed on the verandah crying and howling for me!
Many times he attempted to open the door by jumping up and hitting the handle!

uhm who would have thought I could have made that window so dirty!

uhem who would have thought I could have made that window so dirty!

He stayed all night. Crying and howling. Twice he broke the side gate to my backyard and attempted to get in through the back door!

settling in for a long night...

settling in for a long night...


He also broke many plants and quite destroyed our swinging chair.



And he cried, and he cried, and he cried.

He peed on the front door.

Mumma decided that if he was still there in the morning she would take him to the vet to have his microchip read.

6:00 a.m.
We peer out the window, hoping beyond hope, to find said Staffy gone. Well we couldn’t see him. So Mumma quietly opened the door and peered out. She whispered to me “Darcy I think he’s gone!” THEN

Staffy through the door and on me in an *intimate* fashion.

Daddy grabbed said Staffy and ejected him from the house before too much violation could take place.

8:30 a.m.
A child walked past on his way to school and said Staffy ran to greet him. The child called him to follow and said Staffy followed him to school.

8:31 a.m.
the siege had finally ended.

Well that is until last night when he came *wooing* me again.
I know you’re in there Mr Darcy!

So said Staffy, if your reading this:

my serious, yet sympathetic expression

my serious, yet sympathetic expression

I don’t feel the same way about you, as you feel about me.
Please don’t come round here again. Its just not going to work. We are from different worlds ok?

Wish me luck my fwiends!

Mr Darcy


12 comments on “Unrequited Love

  1. That is quite complicated. He is one confused little pup. I sure hope that his people get him a collar and leash.


  2. Oh My, Mr. Darcy! What an experience you had to go thru!

    That Staffy needs to learn some manners. He obviously doesnt have very good humans if he is out wandering around by his self.

    Take care of yourself and dont forget to keep an eye out for that misquided Staffy

    wags, wiggles & slobbers

  3. Hi Mr Darcy! Sorry we haven’t had a chat for a while, our humans have been very busy since they got back from their long weekend away.

    Oh dear, what a kerfuffle this all was! We would like to say that – regardless of how this young pup might feel – one should never forget one’s manners!! Take Max for example, TOTALLY smitten with Pippa, but he went through the proper wooing process such as the bottom sniff, the play bow and the playful nip on her tail. Only when Pippa did the same back did he know he could really have a proper rough and tumble with her! Mango is very wise – like him we also hope this poor, confused chap gets a collar and lead from his humans.

    Oooh – we’re very excited! Our human finally got a few photos of us playing with Charlie, our lovely Great Dane pal! We plan to post them later next week. JD’s convinced the photos show that he’s only a little bit shorter than Charlie (ahem!) and that his ambition of growing up to be a Giant Schnauzer is going well, he he he!

    Schnauzer snuggles – JD and Max.

  4. Hi Mr Darcy!

    We’ve been having a bit of trouble leaving a message here – we hope this message sticks….! ūüôā

    Oh, we’re sorry to hear about the trials and tribulations you’ve been through with a love-sick puppy. As you know Max is in lod with a litlte cairn terrier who lives near us BUT he remembered his manners and did all the correct forms of wooing first. You know, the bottom sniff, the play bow, the playful botttom nip – he took his time and ONLY when it was reciprocated did he decide he could really ‘roughhouse’ with her, he he he!

    You poor thing – we hope that confused young pup gets a collar and a lead from his owners soon.

    Take care buddy! Schnauzer snuggles – JD and Max.

    • Sorry about the comment not working JD and Max. That happens to me too sometimes – don’t know why.

      Thank you everyone for your support.

      Unfortunately since writing this post said Staffy has been visiting my house every night. The ranger is not on duty at night; and we are all so tired as he is making the most incredible racket the whole night and attempting to scratch his way through the windows.

      We are even getting knocks on the door by cranky hoomans that think said Staffy is our dog.

      As I write this he is scratching at the front window.

      Mr Darcy

  5. Oh my goodness, what mayhem! Where does this poor Staffy live? Where is his family? I think it is terrible that some people don’t put a collar on their dogs and don’t keep them safely contained.

    I hope he didn’t hurt you, Mr Darcy, especially with your Wobblers!

    Maybe it would be a good idea to call the Animal Control so they can come and get the Staffy and return him to his rightful home? (and hopefully have a few strict words with his humans about responsible dog ownership!)

    let us know what happens soon!

    Honey the Great Dane

  6. That is bizarre… I would of bundled him into the car and taken him to the pound. If he followed the boy you could judge the kids age and ask at the school. Who ever owns him doesnt seem to care hes out all night.

    It sounds like the action of an un neutered male with a female in season… I had the same breed do this to my dog at the beach (she wasnt in season) and not an owner to be seen, I was so angry…either way the staffy has to go before your home is wrecked and darcy hurt

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s